Traditional Hindu marriages are not just a social arrangement rather a religious sacrament aimed at a permanent bond between two persons of opposite sex.
If we delve deep into Indian culture we discover eight types of marriages prevalent in ancient times. Out of these eight types two prominent types namely Brahma Vivah (Arrange Marriage) and Gandharv Vivah (Love Marriage) are popular even today.
Brahma Vivah is an arranged marriage and carries consent of both families. Parents or relatives are generally instrumental in selecting life partners for their boys and girls. In many cases nowadays a boy and girl get attracted during some casual acquaintance and then involve their parents or other relatives in finalising the marriage alliance.
Gandharva Vivah is love marriage where partners right from their first meeting feel strongly attracted to each other and decide to be life partners. Some ancient Indian treatises like Manusmriti mention about the practice of love marriages in our country.
Which is better Love Marriage or Arranged?
It is wrong to compare these as both are nature’s ways of bringing together two persons for either working out some Karmic links or evolving them through learning to live together.
A love marriage may fail after some times if it was not pure love rather infatuations between two young persons. Pure love is unconditional hence it has deeper roots. So it is important that lovers take time to decide about marriage so that their alliance is long lasting and blissful.
Parents should not come in the way unnecessarily. It is duty of the parents to equip their young wards with right kind of information and counselling which enables them to make difference between infatuations and true mutual love. Anyone coming in the way of nature’s workings may earn a load of bad Karma so a great amount of discretion and fairness is needed at parental level.
For success of an arranged marriage three factors are very important and should not be overlooked:
1. Consent of both candidates after consideration of each other’s appearance, qualifications and social and financial statures.
2. Parental consideration of other family’s social and economic standing as compared to their own. Any indication of social snobbery or greed of particularly boy’s family must never be overlooked as this can be instrumental in breakup of marriage or lack of marital bliss.
3. Astrological match making can be of great help in selecting right partners. Each person is governed by planetary influences as indicated by their horoscopes. Match making should be thorough and not just confined to ‘Ashtkoot Gun Milan’ (matching of eight types of astrological factors) and ‘Mangalik Dosha’ (Certain placements of Mars in birth chart) consideration.
In addition to these two the following should also be analysed in both candidate’s horoscopes:
Indications of Marital Bliss
Indications of possible separation (Divorce)
Planets Venus, Moon and Mars in both candidate’s horoscopes and also Jupiter in female’s chart give indications of Marital Bliss. For proper and comprehensive match making one should approach a properly qualified consultant.
For comprehensive analysis of birth charts the 2nd and 11th houses also need to be analysed in addition to the usual 7th house.
Match making should be considered only in case of arranged marriage. If there is long lasting true love between two individuals then they should move ahead with full faith in each other rather than get confused with match making. Only those lovers who are not sure of each other’s intentions and thus are not bound strongly may resort to match making in order to help them decide for marriage alliance.
For such individuals consideration of a link between the 5th and 7th houses of the birth chart should be a deciding factor in addition to other considerations.
For a love affair to culminate into a marriage alliance there has to be an association between the 5th and 7th houses of one’s birth chart. This association could be through conjunction of their lords, mutual aspects between their lords, exchange of signs, common constellation etc.